i didn't realize i was such a horrible person...

i didn't know i was such a horrible friend. i mean i sit there and in the beginning was supportive and empathetic, no matter how much trouble you got yourself into or what messed up situation you were a part of. i tried not to judge (which is a little hard when you repeatedly get yourself into this situations and then come tell me about them when its the same story just slight variations) but it got old. so whenever you decided to talk to me i was short and to the point. i'd gotten fed up with listening to the same old story over and over again. "oh poor me, look what i did again." i'd give advice and it would go unused so i stopped trying. i'd listen say i'm sorry and go about my business like you hadn't interrupted me.

now i admit burying my head in the sand was probably not the best way to deal with this but i just became so apathetic about it all, that i didn't really care to talk to you. all you pretty much talk about anyway is how much you miss "him" and oh i really hate this kid (yet you still hang out and freeload off of him any chance you get) so i wasn't really missing much. you seemed to take this as being "mean" to you. well guess what you have never seen me be mean to anyone. you probably wouldn't want to. so when i heard from a mutual friend that you had asked her to "protect you" from me being mean to you, i went off. i legit scared someone because i was so mad. i may be blowing this out of proportion, but i don't care. this made me see that you really DON'T know me. i would never get mad at you in a restaurant full of people, with friends sitting at the table alongside people i didn't even know. that is not me, if i was going to to say anything about the subject (which i wasn't likely too unless you brought it up) it would have either been one on one or with our two mutual friends, not in a public arena. a verbal sparring match in a restaurant is not how i would have dealt with the situation at all. EVER. if i had really had that much of a problem with you (which at the time i didn't) i wouldn't even have gone to lunch with you. i had thought, up until the point where i found out that you asked to be "protected" from me, that lunch went really well. 

so next time (if there is a next time) you think i have a problem with you, come to me about it. i didn't have a problem with you it was the fact that you telling me all your problems was finally starting to annoy me. you get yourself into those situations all the time and i had finally run out of sympathy. but that didn't mean that i was going to verbally attack you just because i didn't want hear anymore about your stupid decisions that get you into these complicated messes that could be completely avoided if you just thought it out a little.