and now i've found some solid ground, i thought i'd drowned but now i'm found, and on the lips of life i kiss, i find i'm here in this place of bliss

so this is the first night i have hung out with anyone besides my family. i have realized that i turn into a hermit while i'm home. but let me tell you i really enjoyed tonight....

i hung out with one of the greatest people i know. sure he and i have been through some rough patches but that has only strengthened our friendship. he and i have been friends since my freshman year of high school and i never knew that i could care so deeply for one person. 

as i said we have had some rough patches but we have always been there for each other. most people don't really understand our friendship and sometimes  (especially in high school) would even question why he was friends with me and visa versa. now i can't tell you his answer but i can tell you mine: no one saw what i saw in him. most people thought he was an ass (which he will be the first to tell you he is) but there was more to it than that and i just wish that more people would see that. of course he doesn't want most people to see that side of him. but underneath that rough exterior is a sweet guy that just wants to be taken care of, appreciated for who he is, and loved.

now he doesn't let most people get to know him well enough to know that side of him but i see myself as privileged especially when the last time i saw him was over the summer. we get together when we can (which i hate to say isn't very often) but when we do it's like no time at all has passed. we could talk for hours about nothing at all and we are always entertained (or at least i am). i consider him one of my best friends right up there with david and i just wish that more people could see the side of him that i do. 

the time that he has spent away from botetourt has changed him (for the better). in high school i saw a lonely boy that had put up a wall to keep people out and now when i see him he is a man confident in himself. to see that change (not that i was there for a lot of it because of certain events, mainly my own stubborn pride, and college) in him makes me proud to be called his friend. 

yes i will admit to wanting our friendship to be more than that but i know that will never happen. i just want him to be happy and to be able to find someone that makes him happy. i am just glad that he lets me be a part of his life and that he makes time to see me the few days that he comes into town to see his family (and i really mean few like 5 days at the most).